I feel so much here. I feel like I'm a full person here. I mentioned before, that sometimes we forget to feel loved. And ya, I have forget, not just to feel love, but to feel.

You know, things in Singapore are operated on such a "follow-the-line" basis. No crossing the roads when the red man is there (or even when the green man is flashing), no compromises on being late for meetings (I know that I'll be punched for saying this), no compromises, for having a proper meal when one is late for a project meeting (I really don't like this, but o well). It is either this, or that. No middle ground.

Things are done in an operational manner. Do it, or not do it. You are expected to do things that are assigned to you. Nothing wrong with that, but somehow, the way that it is conveyed is harsh.

I have blogged about it before, that efficiency kills. And this is when it really does. Do this, by XX/XX/09. Any negotiation? Ah, it depends on who the person who assign you the task is.

Maybe because relationships are not properly built before tasks are assigned. Or maybe, people in Singapore just don't build relationships the way I want to. Or maybe I am an alien, a person who doesn't know how to relate to the shallow people of the island (I'm so sorry, but I feel this way sometimes).

And sadly, I have become one of them. A person who's struggling to be one of them. Shallow people. Joining them in the so called "rat race". Well, I definitely don't like it. I am not living. I am doing. When have I transformed, from a human being, to a human doing? Ah. The influences of the society.

But I'm glad, that everytime I'm back here, I regain myself, finding myself again. Hopefully, I will learn more, on how to feel, rather than how to do, in Singapore.