Everyone has many thoughts in their head. Here is a fair share of my current negatively-provoked ones.

1. People react differently when they are thrown into different places, different situations.
When I am in Penang, it's the ol' times. Comfortable. My comfort zone. Sad to say, I depended less on God. I tell myself: It is ok, I will use this time to meet up with my friends. God can come later. Ahh, such a sad thought. Before going back, I told myself that I should use the time in Penang to catch up with God, read the Bible, talk to Him more. But alas, deviating thoughts by the naughty devil caught hold of my mind.
On the other hand, I will depend more on God when I am in Sg. Natural maybe. I am thrusted into a relatively unfamiliar world. I need someone to depend on. There is where God comes in...I will pray to Him, and almost always, my prayers needs are answered.
Sometimes you know that this thing is good for you, but you just don't want to embrace it, for fear that it takes up your time, fear of rejection.

2. Hurts are hurts, and will always be.
At some point of time last year or this year, I realise how I behave towards people is a reflection of the hurt I perceived I received from my parents and family in the past. The cruel and harsh words I received while a child...it does not hurt anymore, because it is so long ago. But in actual fact, the scar is still there. It has not heal. Humans do things based on the best solution that they used through past experiences. So for me, through my past experience, I think that getting angry at someone will work. That is why I still react that way when I am triggered by someone or something that is similar to what I experienced in the past.
I am deeply sorry for the way I act towards anyone who perceive that I did something incorrect.

--end--